Who am I now?

[irishblessings]

My S received a 2 page letter from his dad today. Here are some excerpts -

I know that our relationship has changed to say the least. I knew that it would through all of this but I felt like it was something I had to do for both your mother’s sake and for mine. I do feel I need to let you know that if when you do come to my place you will see some influence of, and things of OW’s in it.

I have gotten close enough to OW that she has become an every day part of my life. When I left home last year I was not expecting to find, or looking for, another close female friendship or relationship. The night I met her I was looking for socialization, relaxation, and some potential new friendships. OW, a couple of her friends and I hit it off greatly and we have had an awesome time ever since! OW is smart, funny, kind, loud, tender, loving, loyal, strong, independent, and hard working. She is a huge basketball fan, college basketball fan, professional tennis fan, and an unbelievable cook! She has been through some incredibly difficult life experiences but has amazingly worked through them and lives a life that exemplifies spiritual, physical and emotional peace.

In no way has OW and/or her family taken the place of, or could ever take the place of you or the girls! I want to have a great relationship with all four of you. I do hope and expect that to happen over the course of the next couple, few years. If/when you all do give yourselves a chance to get to know OW and her family, I do believe that you will enjoy their company and will be able to have some fun, good times with them. Her daughters and grandchildren are beautiful, fun loving people. I’m sure that you cannot imagine it now but they are all looking forward to times in which we call all be together to laugh, cut up and talk about life. I talk about and brag about all three of you all the time and they can only imagine how good of people you all are. They are looking forward to the possibility of meeting all of you but at the same time understand and sympathize very deeply with what you are going through.


I am numb - devastated again. When does this stop - how do I make it stop? I feel like roadkill. The way he describes her could almost to a tee describe me. But it's not me.