Take CountrySong's advice and discuss the other debts. BUT quibbling about any of the costs of your son is beneath you. Don't measure out meals and diapers and such or you'll look very small. Besides, the person who has the child the most ends up paying for things the other parent never thinks of, like increased utilities and a bigger apartment and gas for trips to the store and blah blah blah. Don't even go there. Besides, you were unemployed for some time and if she wanted to get nit picky she could go down that road and you don't want that. Plus I don't know who earns more and how long she was unemployed, if at all.
Originally Posted By: 25yearsmlc
I am absolutely sure I spend more on our son than she does -- house, expendables, insurance, etc. And I don't have an issue with paying for it, but what I question and have a beef with is her principles. She had told me she would take over things like diapers, but out of the blue she e-mails me the cost for diapers this past month? I think that's just rude and presumptuous, especially for someone who's wanting to go the prim and proper way of divorce. Also, my wife has been a student since 2002, with the occasional part-time jobs in-between. She has been completely concentrating on medical school, motherhood (took a year off), and has school loans as one source of income (besides mine). You are right 25, my wife is actually being nit-picky. The reason why I'm paying for her BOA card is for that reason: she says that I am responsible for all the charges due to my unemployment periods over the years. She added a couple more thousand to that when she decided to leave the house -- am I responsible for that? No. Last year, I had quoted her the amount she says that I "took" from her cards and loans over the 6 years (excluding the cost of tuition and school-related expenses, of course) was compensated 4 times over by my salary from my last job alone. She said baloney, so I left it at that. And now she pulls this stunt.
[quote=25yearsmlc] So let this guide you in how you handle your w. Don't be a doormat but don't quibble or sweat the small stuff. She's watching you. Be fair and calmly resolve this.
The better you two work this out, the more hope there is that you can work things out maritally. But as for your son, I would not be measuring out things for him. Cover him. He's yours.
I do feel like I'm being used. I paid for all his things before and during our separation, but now that she CHOOSES to take our son to HER home with the assumption that she is the PRIMARY caregiver, she still wants me to split 50:50? What the beegads?
