Just remembered one more thing that struck me this morning. W mentioned that she forgot to give back one of the photo albums that I had brought her last Friday. It was of our Europe trip. She said she looked through it and it was “fun.” She avoided pictures of us like the plague not too long ago…

As I write about this, it makes me think of a few things.

I am still trying to find answers and hope in the things she says and does.

In some ways, finding hope in what she says and does helps keep me going.

But what happens if I no longer see it? Am I dependant on searching for positives from HER in order to live for ME? If so, I will fail.

This whole ordeal has really set me back as far as detaching. I just can’t stop thinking about her. I guess I should be considering what happened, but it also hurts.

BITS

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.