While I do not recommend it, especially not the way it happened for me, I will tell you that getting out of that small town has been quite helpful.
I'm not sure it's because I had planned this, just the change in scenery, or more. Things have already changed. Both in me, and in W, even with as little contact as I have had with her, and noticeable in her recent email.
One thing I've noticed is, as uncomfortable as it was to be in the same room as W as it had been in the past. Just being within the same small community meant there was always an opportunity to "sneak a peek", as it were. And truth is, it was not just me doing so. I'd noticed that W had certain moments of "curiosity" that led her to drive by my previous place. Even though it was the most natural route out of or into town. I realized that as over time, W would eventually make comments about how "the yard looked clean" or "it looked busy there". She was looking. She was curious. She was snooping...
And it wasn't just her. FIL would make mention to W about things he'd notice or hear. He lived only a couple blocks down from me. Then there was one of her enabling friends who had to drive past on her way into and out of town. Etc, etc...
Anyhow, point is, now that I'm not there, W makes comment on my dark. I'm no more dark now than I have been for the past three weeks. Only now that I'm not there... now W can only satisfy her curiosity by actually contacting me directly. Me... I'm no longer curious... but I also don't have much opportunity to allow for that curiosity.
In your sitch... you don't have that opportunity. Since the only thing you can do is control yourself, you'll have to find some way of distracting yourself from that behaviour.
Sorry... I don't have any suggestions right now...
