Trying to figure out how to break it to him...

[Daybreak]

Wow Z - H seems to be a real contrarian, doesn't he?

Either that or he has some serious control/codependency issues that he refuses to acknowledge, let alone face in the open.

I didn't realize that you were married prior to your current sitch and that your 1st H died related to cancer. Although I haven't gone through this personally, I know a couple of close friends who succombed to this scourage as well as another currently battling pancreatic cancer. In each case, their spouses have been very supportive of their individual choices regarding treatment options, hospice care, etc.

It comes back to needing to assume ownership for all of your choices in life. It seems you have a good medical support system in your sitch and that you take the effort to educate yourself to know what to watch for and to ask the right questions. I did read up on Sjorgen's syndrome online. It still amazes me the amount and quality of information available now compared to a few years ago. Exciting but scary at the same time...