I read 12 books. Applied a lot of it. Got into Retrouvaille with 1/3 participation from my soon to be xwife.
Still getting divorced.
It isn't wether you love him, it is whether you can meet enough of his emotional needs (etc.) when he is with you. Equally, if you aren't a happy camper with him...your needs meeting, too.
I feel broken, too. It [censored]. I'm rebuilding now, and feeling better. If I had got to the feeling better part earlier, maybe the fall wouldn't have been so hard or have happened at all.
And then, there is destiny - the fact that some things need to happen to us for us to grow and become the best we can be.
If there was one thing always missing in my marriage that made my happiness hard to ever reach was that my wife was never happy with me. She claimed her love even until the month she/I filed. But she wasn't happy. A theorize that a woman's lack of self-esteem will drain a husband's self-worth.
Love running into him. He's your kids' father. Always. Maybe in the process, he'll rediscover his old love for you. More importantly, you might rediscover your love for you.
