OnMyWay: to who knows where?

[OnMyWay]

:)The issue is that she is undermining your authority as a parent, setting a bad example for your D by encouraging her to lie/cover for her mother (your perception of how D sees this, let's assume that was not wife's intent), and that you are disappointed that she felt the need to change the focus of mother/daughter time to include someone else (making D uncomfortable, not giving her more time to adjust to this before bringing other men into her life). As a woman and a mother, that speaks to me.

I should clarify about this OM. He had been a friend of ours. I don't know if they are having a PA (she's not his type), but I do think there is an emotional attachment for both of them. When she began drifting from me, I notice she would being to rely on him a some sort of surrogate male to fill in when I wasn't around. As our problems got worse, he and their group of friends (both males and females) became my W's "support group," - really just a close bunch of 4-5 people who would comfort her - which is nice name for "enabling her," going back to the alcoholic analogy again. The are all currently single and between them all, they averaged two failed marriages a piece - misery loves company. I don't say I told her so, but I had told her so. What do I know, I'm just the LBH.

So, with regards to my D, it has been natural for her to be around him in the past, so she may not think anything of it at the time. It's not until I ask her about her day when I begin to see the look on her face were she feels she's in a tight spot. I don't think W does it maliciously, but she does know how I feel about it and is apparently trying to exert some sort of "I'm not going to let you push me around" kind of thinking here. As if I ever was controlling of her - but, hey, whatever she thinks is her problem.