Sorry you are in this pain the second time around. I believe you will find the DB board helpful if you will stay in touch by giving a regular update. A lot of people are here that are experiencing the same kind of hurt.
How long was your W M before she called you wanting to go back home?
If her doctor did not wean her off the AD meds, that will affect her state of mind.
Have you read Divorce Remedy? If not, get that ASAP!
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!