Tad let me share something with you. I don't know how your sons are dealing with this other than what you tell us but I am sure they are hurting. When my son lived at home with me, he DID NOT want me to utter his dads name. He wouldn't let me know how he felt about his dad leaving at all. I didn't ask though. I didn't want to say anything bad about his dad. Anyway, come to find out, when son would go to visit his dad, he would tell him stuff that was going on at home.apparently dad was asking. BUT when he was here he would not say anything about his visit with his dad. My son didn't want to hurt me with the details. What I am trying to say is watch what u say or do around your children, because they do love you both and they DO get questioned a lot. They are put in the middle more than we realize. I didn't realize that my x asked about me or that my son told my x when I asked about him. My son was only trying to help and he was hurting. I was blind to all of it because I was such a mess. I put my child in the middle at times and I will regret that for the rest of my life.
It really affects our children. That's the worst part of this all!
Also Tad I know what you mean about never having been in this place before. We lived in a 3 story house, in a nice subdivision and drove nice cars. When I went shopping I didn't usually even look at prices. I only worked part time to stay busy mostly. BUT all that changed overnight. I lost my home. I had to draw food stamps and some other assistance. The part time job I had became my only source of income....but you know what I made it with the Grace of God! I have heard that sometimes we have to hit rock bottom before we give God our attention. That's what I think happened to me. I have said this before and I will say it again. Only God can give you the Peace you need. Draw closer to him and he will draw close to you!
