Scylla I am sorry to hear that. I am not sure what perception you have of God and why you have that, but I do know that God has changed my life forever. I wasn't always a believer. When my mother passed away when I was in High School I said there is no God. I prayed daily for her and asked God to let her live, she was dying of cancer.
I was only 15 and in my mind since she wasn't saved there was NO God. What little did I know that there really is a God. I have built a relationship with him over the years. It was when I was at my darkest hour years ago is when I foud him.
I simply just prayed for God to come into my life and help me. He did just that. With my most recent testimony, it's clear to me God is walking with me on this journey of life.
I am certainly not here to suggest you find God, but he is there should you desire to seek him out. I will pray for you that God touch your soul and you have the desire to seek him out. You won't be dissappointed. Hugs!
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"