I am home from the camping trip. Took my time getting home. Stopped and picked up a Mother's Day gift from my S.
W stops by the house. She is an emotional wreck today. She said seh just wants to go lie down. She said, "This doesn't seem real does it?". I said "Yes, it doesn't. That doesn't mean I have to like it. You also don't have to like it."
A neighbor and his friend are coming over to help her move some stuff. I think she ASSUMED I was going to be here. But I told her I had intended on helping her, so I guess I better stay here. She left it up to me whether I wanted to help her or not.
She did ask me if I was all right when she was on her way out. I told her I thought I was in a lot better shape than her right now, and she agreed (Thanks DB!). I told her I have a lot of strength right now. She said she doesn't at all, that she's very weak today.
To be honest, I can write here that this is a TOUGH day. I realy don't want to be here. On the other hand, she's seeing a lot of strength right now.
The neighbor and his friend bailed on my W today on the move. I ended up helping her brother. I emotionally disconnected as much as I could when I was down at her apartment. Man that was TOUGH. She was an emotional mess today, so that didn't help. I wanted to hold her so bad, but I know I can't right now.
I am feeling about as well I could expect, and I'm going through cycles right now. I don't know whether it's detaching, just suppressing what's going on right, or blind faith that everything's going to be OK in the end - and this is just a necessary step to get there.
Hey JB, just read up on your threads...thanks for stopping in on mine as well.
I think you did an amazing job handling today. Doubt I would have been able to show that much strength under the circumstances. I have helped my W carry some things out to the car when she's been going back and forth from here to her parents house...but a full on move out would be too much for me I think.
But that being said, hopefully the time apart is what you guys need. I know that's what I'm hoping for on my end as well.
Stay strong.
BITS M: 35 W: 27 T 7.5 years M 5 years No kids My EA: 3/08 Her EA: 1/11, discovered 3/11 (ongoing?) ILYBINILY, D mentioned 3/8/11 W at parents house: 4/16/11
I am sorry a out today man. When my W moved out I was a complete wreck. She did it while I was at work, and I came home to a severly empty house. You are a strong person to dos what you did today. You should be proud.
And thanks for thinking of me today with everything going on in your sitch. More than I could have done also.
Hang in there, and thanks for your support again!!
BITS
M:34 W:28 SD:9 D:6 (pr) M:3 T:6 Separated 1/16/11 ILYBNILWY 10/25/10 PA discovered 11/12/10, began about 10/1/10
I am not who I was, I am being remade, I am new...
It's day 1 of the new era. I am hoping and praying it's a temporary era. I will continue to strive to be strong and become the better man.
I am going to start my day with a 3 mi. run and head to church. From there, it's off to my Mom's and the two of are going out for lunch. My S is with my W today, and should be. She is going to her parents for a cookout.
We had a change of plans and now my W is not going to church with me and we're not going to lunch together. It's OK, I really kind of expected it.
Thanks DG. I am going to really use this as an opportunity to GAL. It will be means of escape, too.
I have to remember that my W will also be coming home to an empty house as well. She had been sharing her day with when I got home from work and well, that's not going be happening anymore.
Day 1 after W moving out just happens to Mother's Day. Very tacky, W. It's also the 3 year anniversary of Bomb#1.
I went up and had lunch with my Mom today. She made some comments around not wanting me to in pain anymore and half of her wants me to just give up on my M. I am not ready to give up right now, and defended my position. She also made a comment that he was behind me in taking the high road.
My W had my S today and went to her parents' house. Her sibling were there sans any spouses. Her sister is twice-divorced and her brother was just in town to help her move.
When I get home my W is at the house, folding laundry. We had a decent conversation. Just talked about our days. She was doing pretty well today. She was not the emotional wreck she was yesterday. Just small talk between the two of us. She kind of hinted around and we ended up going out to eat at a sub place. She actually ended up sitting on the same side of the table because she wasn't sure my S was going to make room for her. We drove seperately because I needed to go grocery shopping for the week and she was going back to her apartment afterward.
So I will have my S through Wednesday. I am already starting to tweak the rules a bit. He packed his own lunch for school - I was proud of him for that. Unfortunately, we are not going to have as much one on one time as I would like, but I will have him this coming weekend, too. We should be able to spend some time together then.
Here we go! Day #2. I will stop counting eventually. My first official day as a single Dad getting my S ready for school and on the bus. He didn't miss the bus, he had breakfast, and he packed his own lunch last night with my supervision. So I pulled it off.
I will leave work a little early today and work from home if necessary.
It actually looks like there's a chance softball won't be rained out tonight! Yes! Part of my GAL plan. The only bad part is my S will have to sit in the bleachers.
