So yes I got a very angry email from my wife, but no d threat.So I sent an email to my wife yesterday saying she is not to contact me for some time as I need some space. I was lovingly detached and said she will always be part of the family and cared for but because she broke the boundaries, I now needed to stop communications with her. I was calm, confident assured in tone and made no accusations at her.

Before that she called my mother yesterday to ask her to look after the kids, but as soon as she started talking to my mom, she started crying so hard she had to go, saying she misses us. This is the first contact with her since the split.

This is hard to do, but I think she might be starting to get a glimpse this week what the ongoing reality is going to be. I can only hope that it makes her consider a few things.

I see her now as a addict, who when she is denied her fix ( contact with the om ) lashes out. I dont think it makes it easier for my heart, but it helps me visualise her differently.

So now I suppose I am in LRT. Im going to spend the next couple of weeks getting all of the financials, custody etc sorted out behind the scenes ( have to be prepared for all contingencies )

I am going to rewrite my goals, boundaries and minimum standards, and then see what she does.

Any input is always appreciated, coz I wonder if I am doing the right thing on an hourly basis.

Facingdivorce
Me: 46 W: 40
D8 D6
Seperated feb 2011