From small beginnings come great things

[MichelleLT]

You need to slip the hook and start swimming before she'll ever consider getting in the water.

This is what I am trying to figure out right now, how to go about this without burning bridges. Some days I feel like saying “WTH are we doing here? I am confused. Can we just be honest with our feelings here?” of course I will not……………..right now. So I am trying to figure out a way to back away without seeming like a jerk. Last few times we have spoken I have kept the convo’s light she has thrown her little jabs but I have not taken the bait.

At this point, it's not about you worrying about burning bridges. You are polite, you let her be involved in D's life, you don't act maliciously or in retaliation at her.

That's more than enough to not burn bridges. She D'd you. She has no right to expect anything from you. (Obviously that doesn't mean she might not expect things from you, but realistically she shouldn't)

If she wants you, she will come to you.

Just look at what you wrote about the end of your first M! WHEN YOU STARTED DATING SHE STARTED CHASING YOU. That is absolutely classic behavior, especially with an OP involved.

This one isn't that much different, except she is still placating your with words, trying to keep you as plan B.

You only think it is confusing because you are focusing on what she is saying. Take a step back and look at the big picture. Look at her actions. One of the basic rules of DBing is believe none of what they say and only half of what they do.

Start wading out.