WAW The cold & cruel truth!

[25yearsmlc]

I'll get to the rest of your post and situation today if possible. My "spring break" is over soon but I've found myself back in DB land. (I used to check in every few months to see how my DB buddies were doing. Many leave this site so you don't know the end result. Did they feel defeated or did they work out and think there wasn't much to say? I think now that more of us who restored the m's should come by and chime in.)

It does amuse and irk me, when I see people who did NOT DB well, who lost their m, come here to advise others to do what THEY did, when clearly their approach failed. Beware of the punitive people who want to shove their righteousness down spouses throat. My gut says that's why you filed (?)

They are not coming from a place of love, or restored M's. Then again, sometimes no matter what you do, the m can end, and then you go to the forums here, that discuss surviving a Div. Bottom line, do you want to be "right" or do you want to save and restore your m? (I add the word "restore" b/c it means more than simply not divorcing, though that is a step towards restoring).

Never say never. Even now, as we are planning a cruise for our 30th anniversary, I don't simply assume we are "all better." A good marriage is a work in progress. Ours sure is.

In this state, 1/3 of divorces filed are never completed. Therefore they don't end up divorced.

I don't recall what state you are in nor do I know why you filed, when it comes to DBing. I guess it was a huge ultimatum? Now you are in a place you don't want to be.

Okay so I'll finish catching up but if you could summarize things, that would be lots faster. I don't need the blow by blows or more than one example of something.

Do you still want to save your m?