Half in and half out... How do I move forward?

[barnaby]

How do your older children treat your H? Are they disrespectful toward him? Do they resent him?

I would say the older one (aged 7) is cheeky sometimes. IMO she is not MORE cheeky to him in particular. I think he realises this, but feels I do not do enough to keep her in check.

The 4-year-old I think is a little scared of him, she definitely respects his authority as she will jump if he says "this is how it is." She always has a wary eye when he walks into the room.

I do not think they resent him. Tbh they were very young when their dad left, and in particular the younger one can only remember him living with us (the older one has vague memories.) I do think the younger one looks to him for more than he gives, when he has his more giving moments with them, her little face lights up. She also calls him "daddy A---" when talking about him to others, such as at school. I don't think he appreciates how she sees him or how she hopes for more interaction with him that she doesn't always get.

The older one just thinks he is always in a bad mood...!