I assume from your name that you are somewhere near Denver. Why not book some time with Michelle Weiner-Davis? I've heard that she is absolutely fabulous.
Your wife is waiting for Cupid to hit her with an arrow, or for the stars to align, or some other outside force to grab her and tell her what she wants in life. She needs to spend some time in a positive structured way to look inward and see what she wants. Love doesn't come from the outside. It is a decision. Waiting around for a decision to happen to you is not the way it works.
Of course, I recommend Retrouvaille. But I know your wife works weekends and won't give up a weekend for something else.
My husband and I went to a Retro meeting this past weekend because we both know that we are slipping back into roommate status. And no, the path of our interaction there was not natural. We neither could or would have had that conversation by ourselves. We were led to the topic by the leaders of the group. And it was a good bonding experience. Afterwards, we felt better about ourselves.
Marriage is a lifelong commitment. This won't be the only hard time. It's important to find a way of dealing with the problems that works for you. Waiting for them to just go away isn't it.
