New - HELP! Tried the 180/Last Resort & Failed

[AloneAt35]

Its 12:30 at night, I'm in bed pretending to be asleep. My partner was supposed to come home on Sunday, then he said Monday after work, then he said Monday evening, then three hours ago he said he was on his way - but still, he's a no show. I guess maybe his plan is just to sneak home in the middle of the night, get his papers and then leave.

I have been working on 180s/LRT all day, was prepared to be mysterious, dressed cute, busy-busy all day "as if" I am moving on, but there is no pain like this.

The man I knew called if he was going to be a moment late, and checked in all day to see how I was doing. Now he is AWOL with another woman. Suddenly I no longer think she lives in another state like he said, suddenly I think he is with her now.

There is no agony like this. He is a different person. No one deserves to be treated this way. I never thought he could so something like this. He was nearly perfect in my eyes. I am crushed. Why is he behaving this way? Where did his love go? Why did he become a monster with no conscience?