Another New Day 3

[islander]

W tm me and said she picked up an extra job tomorrow to help pay our car ins bill. I did not and will not respond to her.

She tm me this morning about how busy she was she couldn't talk, now she has time for an extra job.

I know she is exxpecting me to reply to that along those lines, but I will not.

The convo was a bad idea anyway.


-

I really believe that OM dies not want her coming over to our house so we can talk too. I think this caused her some sort of problem with him on saturalday when we spoke.

I know I am analyzing. My mind just keeps going in overdrive right now. But I am writing here instead of to my W.

[♪CS♪]

W tm me and said she picked up an extra job tomorrow to help pay our car ins bill. I did not and will not respond to her.

Can you explain this situation? Are you both responsible for this bill?

What is your general financial arrangement with the W?

[islander]

Our financial arrangement is that all of our money goes into one account and we make sure all of our bills get paid. Her apartment bills included. We still have life ins car ins and everything together. There has been no separation of bills.

btw, she tm me and said she decided not to take the extra job, and to let her no about meeting tomorrow.

I want to reply that my silence is an answer, but that would defeat the purpose.

I think I am going to shut the door on my W, but not lock it.

[♪CS♪]

Our financial arrangement is that all of our money goes into one account and we make sure all of our bills get paid. Her apartment bills included. We still have life ins car ins and everything together. There has been no separation of bills.

btw, she tm me and said she decided not to take the extra job, and to let her no about meeting tomorrow.

This puts you in a tough spot.

You say she makes more $ than you and you could not afford your bills if she only pays half.

That means she is helping to support you.

If she offers to pick up a job again in the future to help pay for the bills, I suggest you thank her. She is already going above and beyond what she needs to do with respect to the finances.

You may want to think about your long-term plan and how you can become self sufficient with your finances.

Just 2 pennies.

[islander]

I am starting to think about looking for a job that will pay more money. The other thing I have going with my line of work is that there is always extra money to be made. But I don't want to have to work everyday either.

As far as out bills go, I feel that she is just as responsible as me to make sure they get paid, until we are D. I know she can make it more difficult than she is right now, and she knows I appreciate her working. She also knows that I am working more to bc my checks are quite a bit bigger most of the time. And she also knows I am spending as little money as possible too.


The thing about the car ins is that WE had the money, but she decided to spend it knowing the bills that we had coming up. We had even talked about it, so I am a little frustrated about it. But I am done talking to her about it too. I have some money set aside she doesn't know about and will add it too what she saves, and we should be able to pay it on time.

I need to go dark for a little while and regroup myself. I don't like doing that, but I need to right now. This is taking a toll on me.

[NEmoose43]

The financial thing is something I haven't had to deal with yet...I know W opened her own bank account, but she hasn't done anything with it. Checks still coming in to our joint account, and no transfers or withdrawals so far.

But I think the fact that she's noticed your extra $$$ coming in and the fact that you're watching spending is probably a big thing. It's one of those things that shows effort without really trying if you know what I mean. But I agree with Country on being self-sufficient with your stuff...even if it's going into the same account, a plan couldn't hurt.

When it costs me $45 to HALF fill my Jeep's gas tank, Lord knows I'm already planning ahead.

[islander]

Ok. I need advice on how to handle my sitch. I don't know if going dark is right or not. Any advice is welcome. I just don't know what to do

[islander]

I sent W a tm this morning on my way home from work in response to her tm yesterday wanting me to let her know if I was going to meet her today.

I said: no, I worked last night to help us pay our bills.


I left it at that
I was off but picked up a shift bc another person took the night off.

[jbnati]

islander, I think that was a good move. It sounds like she just wanting to drag you into a fruitless conversation. I think at the very least a little elusiveness is in order. If you do end up getting wrapped up in the conversation, you should probably take most of what she says with a grain of salt, anyway.

[islander]

Actually, I was the one who initially wanted to talk to her. But she changed the place and time at the last minute. I decided it was not worth talking to her and wouldn't do any good at that point