wife having affair - please help

[facingdivorce]

Hi
I posted on newcomers, but my responses dont seem to get posted up , so not sure what the problem is.

Anyway I have definately confirmed my wife is having an affair - in fact as I have moved out he has been coming over and today when I looked at my 6 year olds toy camera there is a picture of him in my lounge room. in fact they went on a trip together with my kids....

He works with my wife and he is married with 2 kids.

The humiliation and hurt is just overwhelming and my wife continues to deny the affair.I feel destroyed over this, to think another man is playing with my kids is just devastating and my wife is so callous as to it all.

I know I am supposed to be nice to her and act as if, I know Im supposed to be upbeat, but I just am unable to breathe let alone speak

How am I to handle this, i want to tell his wife and return the pain, but is that advisable. Any help from those of you who have gone through this would be great as I am on my own and feel like Im this expendable commodity.