Half in and half out... How do I move forward?

[barnaby]

I should add, I'm implementing the 180 which was recommended by a friend. I have been far too nice and stepped back on being hardline too many times now. As soon as he shows any amount of willing, I buckle. He's basically spent the last week living here but not being committed to working things out. Acting as though we're a couple again, he said he felt we were seeing how things went.

I said that wasn't good enough for me, I wanted his complete commitment.

On his part, he feels that his feelings for me haven't changed- he still feels the same as he always has and still loves me. It's the step-family situation he has trouble with.

He also has only gone halfway to owning what has happened with the other girl. He feels that as he didn't pursue her as in wanting anything physical to happen, that he hasn't been unfaithful. He has trouble seeing that I feel his behaviour with texting her and going to visit her is at least, inappropriate, because he says as far as he was concerned, he was just being friendly, and that the way he has acted has caused me to feel distrustful of him.

He would basically prefer for me to put it in the past and not ever bring it up again, and to be ok with it because it happened and he can't change it. Well I accept it happened and he can't change it, but he is loathed to take any responsibility.

I have been reading about the 180 and feel it's the best approach, not only to know whether he's in or out, but for my sanity!