Calystra - I have managed one day of being completely dark and it feels like a year. Even after confirming that my STBX is now openly involved with her boss, I still miss her and want her back in my more emotional moments. I have set a goal of not contacting her at all until her birthday on June 23rd, when I plan to do nothing more than calling and saying "Happy birthday...how are you?".
I have done the dark thing in the past over the last year and a half and I can assure you that it does get easier with time. Let's make a pact to rely on each other to remain dark. It helps to have another person to answer to.
