Through all of this, have you ever just tried being the woman's friend?
Cat, I am trying to figure out at this point if I want to or if I can. I did NOT bring the convo to R on Friday. Sure I took the bait. Stupid of me.
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Having a conversation with her that didn't turn into R talk?
Yes
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Getting off of the phone at a good point?
Yes
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For her own reasons, she wants to continue contact, to which you haven't been opposed, even though you were advised to minimize it...
Ok so here we have a woman that did not feel listened to or respected or valued and my level of contact should have diminished? I will give you one better. My DB coach suggested not only I talk to her and allow her to vent but to initiate more contact with her to not go dark or allow too many days to go by without talking to her. There was a clear goal at that point. Bust the D. There is no clear goal anymore.
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Do you know how to do that with someone?
Such a loaded question. You know what one of my 180 was, to be friendly with her and talk when she called. If she would have called the old 2step there would have been 1 phone call made and that would have been it.
I could say so much more today about this subject but I won't.
