YR, you have been at this about as long as me, and so you know the score, but to say that my xh was volatile during the divorce process is putting it mildly. Whether he was genuinely spinning or manipulating in a very calculating way, I still have no idea, but what they appear to agree one day will not necessarily be what they want or believe was agreed on another, even when the lawyers tell them . . . .
I am so glad it is over, even though I never wanted it.
