Rollercoaster of love

[LearningPatience]

Not much new to add this morning. Got one practical question text from W yesterday, answered her a while later and got a thanks. Spent evening with my kids and bought tickets to go see a concert in Toronto this summer. Bought two tickets in case anyone wants to come along but am more than willing to go by myself.

While falling asleep last night, the usual jumbled thoughts came through before the Ambien kicked in. One that I'd never had before that I really liked was the realization that I will *not* be a victim, in my MR or in any other R again. I'm tired of the feeling and it's time to move on from that.

One thing that may be hard in my detaching process is our group of friends. There's a long standing tradition of going to the bar for a few drinks on Wednesday nights, different bars each week, different cast of characters each time. I enjoy meeting up with my friends but have mixed feelings about my W being there. Part of me would love to see her on Weds and part of me hopes she doesn't go. Most of the people there are people I introduced her to and are sympathetic to me (most are advocating dumping W), but no one has been anything but nice to each of us.

I used to feel that maybe I should just quit going to make it easier on her, but I've realized that she's the one that alienated herself to the group so if she's uncomfortable, she can be the one to stay home.

OK, enough rambling for now...