Still lots of mixed signals going on. I get text messages from her that are running conversations. Wants to tell me how her run when that day (training for a marathon - which she was talked into), how she was feeling at work (headache, stomach issues), etc. I usually don't answer them for an hour or so, unless they are important. Lots of friendly chit chat when we are both home together (weekends only). I know that it is probably mostly out of habit, or even acting like everything is ok, rather than have to actually discuss the matter. We have mediation in two weeks, and yet she still won't sit and discuss what we are going to do - even though I have asked. She doesn't really want to talk about anything important or that has substance. Just idle chit chat. She has always been this way, not wanting to really deal with a tough issue, just pretend that everything is ok and then hope it works itself out. And so it is with our M, and apparently our D.
Quick story - 2 years ago we had a lease on a 4wd vehicle. We have not had a car in 16-18 years. Always had either trucks or suv's. When the lease was up, she tells me that she is tired of those, and is ready to drive a car for a change. I remind her that we live in the country, and in the winter our road sometimes becomes impassable for cars - sometimes even for trucks. After much back and forth discussion about the pros and cons, she says "I really want a car". I tell her I think you will regret it, but it's your decision. So she buys the car, and proceeds to tell me for the next few months how much she likes it and is glad she got it. Fast forward to winter - she hates it. Hates driving in the snow and feels like she has no control without 4wd and occasionally gets stuck. She calls me and my son, and we go get her unstuck from wherever she is, sometimes she is stuck in our own driveway! Believe it or not, I never say I told you so. But she will usually say "I wish I would have listened and bought an suv or truck."
Why the story? Because now she seems to making a similar decision. One that is wrong and bad for her on so many different levels (not to mention for me and our kids). But she just seems hell-bent on this course of action, and nothing seems to slow down long enough to think. Not reason, not ration, nothing. I don't think it helps that she has the OM plus her lawyer/running friend (female) encouraging her. I just think it will be a repeat of her car buying choice. After a brief "fling" with a car, she will want her "truck" again. Maybe not. I guess we will see.
I opened a Facebook account a few weeks ago, and she found out about it this last weekend. She carried on about it and tried to make me feel bad. Said she was "surprised" that I would do that, with it being such a huge waste of time. Quoted me as saying that people who do that are such losers. Actually, what I said was I don't see how people can sit on their computers and facebook all day (ala my SIL). I explained (not that I needed to) that before I didn't care to, because she was my social circle, my best friend. I had let friends and family drift away and was ok with that - I always had her. Now, that is about to change. I told her I use it infrequently to reconnect or keep in contact with friends and family - that just because she is leaving I am not going to sit around and be lonely. Well, I hope not for long, anyway! LOL.
