Just bought the Sex starved marriage book. At least we're reading it together - after an angry explosion.
...Thirty years together, good friends, good communication, but less and less sex, and now none, for months. Zero desire on her side.
...And I don't want sex without desire. So at least there's something going on, we're reading, talking. But still no real change on what matters to me.
....It's hard to feel desired when there's no desire, to feel loved when there's none of the love that you want and need. I'm torn between hope and despair. Why should things change now? We've been to a therapist, and that didn't help at all, possibly made things worse...
You might try reposting your story in the SSM forum on this website.
I echo the book Chapman's Five languages of Love. It along with MWD's SSM and Dr. Glover's No More Mr. Nice Guy, and the support I got on this website really helped rebuild my marriage.
As to therapists, if yours didn't work try another again. From personal experience I would recommend a board certified sex therapist.
Final thought, your situation sounds much like mine a while back, although my wife didn't have the serious medical problems. It takes time, but once the changes start they build quickly. MWD's website and books really helped me and my marriage.
Good luck to you.
>43 years of marriage--My wife and I are now closer than we have been in decades. I believe that my SSM is over.
