New Phase - New Thread After 100 Pages

[BeingMe]

Don't let this destroy you. DO NOT pursue ... it makes you look week from a WAS's POV. When someone is trying to leave a R, and the other is clinging, it just makes that someone want to leave even more. You know this, from DB'ing. You also know that DB'ing is not always going to get your spouse back, in fact, there are very few times that it does, that I have seen on this bb. What it does do, is strengthen and finds a way for you to move on, if you follow the principles.

You were doing so well. This is probably just a hiccup on the road to detaching. It's never easy ... I still find it difficult. I thought I had completely detached from my H, only to discover on starting the S process, I was not as detached as I would like to be.

So, to recap:
Detach = no going to her work, or phoning her, or pleading for her to come home, or say ILU, or texting her, unless it's to do with the kids or finances. That said, do not invent things about the kids or fianances as a way to contact her. She will know. Do not talk about her to anyone. Come here to vent ... we understand.
GAL = going out with friends, having fun, finding a hobby to keep you occupied, exercise, going on holiday by yourself (you never know who you could meet), live life with the possibility in your head that every good thing is possible, because it is. But don't chase it ... let it come to you ... be available to it. Am I making sense?

And I am giving myself this advice as I am writing it. I so need it.