"I realized when reading what my W was writing on the boards that with most people, a divorce isn't necessarily a required option. Assuming we're two fairly normal people without any massive problems (abusing each other, etc), it's possible to work through anything. And that's a pretty big thing to realize. I realized if I went back with her, I didn't need to worry about rejection. I could tell her everything that happened (still was incredibly hard to do), and I was fairly sure she wouldn't kick me out. It's hard putting the trust back in a person, but knowing what she'd said on the board and what she believed in, it made it possible for me to try."
Quote from the H that I found in one of those past threads. What happened to the guy with this opinion? I know that we both stopped working on the M and a lot of the good changes we put in place were forgotten but that doesn't mean it's over. Like I said, it's something that you have to keep working at and we both stopped doing that over the years. That can change.
I know he thinks he has to get to the point of D in order to spark these changes and this sitch is probably just proving that to him but I think it's not as simple as that. I didn't know the sitch was quite that serious. When we did have the discussion about possible D a year and a half ago I barely processed it. Neither of us communicated what the real issues were.
