I woke up very early on Easter Sunday morning, and lay there pondering the miracle of resurrection, and got to examining my conscience. I felt very strongly that I wanted, for my part, to lay aside any residual anger that I felt over how I had been treated by my h over the past 5/6 years, and also to acknowledge any hurts he may have felt, or is feeling in his crazy ML state. I am mostly sorry for him these days, and the crazy person he has become.
So I sent him a brief email, wishing him a happy Easter, and apologising for any part I had played in his unhappiness, telling him I was good, and wishing him well. [I communicate with him very rarely]
I feel lighter for writing it. It doesn't matter [much] if he replies or not, or in what voice. I wrote it for me, and I hope and believe I have no expectations. Another part of letting go of the control of the past, while acknowledging its power. And trying to be honest with myself.
