The most wonderful gift you can give yourself during this process is to stop trying to figure it out. You cannot make something rational out of the irrational. Yes, we all have lost a lot, but we do not have to be victims or look at ourselves as failures. No one should expect to be perfect in a marriage or free from mistakes. Our spouses vowed to give us that unconditional love, but something in their psyche or schemas prevents them from loving beyond themselves. This situation could be permanent or temporary. I am on year number (4), regardless I cannot waste anymore time.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
