WAW tearing up our family part II

[OnMyWay]

Sometimes I'm tempted to just go get a GF and blow up the M and show my W the middle finger, and remind her this is all her fault.

Go ahead and get the GF if you want (eventhough it is not recommended here), but only because it makes you feel better, not because you have something to prove. You know giving the W the proverbial finger (literal or otherwise) will only make you the bad guy. Right or wrong, you can't rub any of this in her face.

After my WAW moved out, I got asked out by a hot chick who was much younger than me. Mind you, I know this board looks down on dating and I don't recommend it, but a few things did happen. First, my W had already given me her blessing to actively date, so I figured there was no harm in it, although she was surprised it happened so soon (3 days after moving out). Second, due the to age difference and the fact that this OW is very attractive, it was a HUGE boost to my badly bruised ego. Third, my DB Coach approved, so I figured, again, it was ok. Last, it actually made my W jealous, although she is rather guarded about admitting it and says she doesn't care. That night, though, she texted me at 9pm that she was all of a sudden "too tired" to drive home to her place and stayed in our home with our D, an obvious ploy to make sure I didn't bring OW home. Very odd for a W who doesn't care about me or what I do. I made sure I stayed out until 4am that night.

Now, I do NOT have a R with this OW and have been nothing but honest with her. She took me out mainly to let me vent and to get me away from my sitch. It was very kind of her. W, however, doesn't know any of the details of my R with her and I'm keeping it that way, as it's none of her business. Point is I have made it a point to NOT rub this OW in W's face. I admit to letting W imagine it in her own mind by not giving up any details, but I've never been anything more than respectful. I always approach from the standpoint of "this is what you wanted" and "I'm simply moving on because you wanted me to."

In an odd way, it seems to be working. I've found out through facebook, she's let her family know about this supposed "OW." There's nothing they can say about it, because they know W cheated on me, asked me for a D, then left me. So, It's hard to argue with me regarding anything I'm perceived of doing with an OW (which is nothing). For some reason, I find this all very humorous.

I guess, ironMan, what I am trying to say is be happy, sure, but alway remain "politically correct" even though it is so tempting throw an nasty "eff ewe" her way and know you are within your rights to do so. I guess it just comes down to being the bigger person, eh? In order to gain our freedom, we have to do this correctly or we loose much more.