Journal Update: It was a beautiful day outside. I decided to take the kids out of the house and enjoy the sunshine. I was going to take a motorcycle ride alone, but I really wanted them to get out. If I was out of the house I know the W would come home from class at noon and go right upstairs to watch TV and use her phone all day while the kids sat downstairs in front of the TV and computer. I took the kids to mother-in-laws house (they hadn't seen her in a while) so we could return some stuff to her. I get along well with MIL (probably better than W as they have always had a strained relationship starting with my W's wild teen years). MIL has been critical of my W's life choices in the past as far as college (never finished) and career choices. W has some older brothers who are quite successful and she has always been aware of the fact that she fails to measure up herself and she believes are kids aren't as smart, athletic, popular as her brother's kids. She also complains that MIL favors the other grandkids. MIL is a widow and I was fixing some things around the house while the kids visited. I didn't bring up the M sitch since MIL doesn't have a clue. I figured that is my W's job to tell her, but she hasn't yet because W knows that her mom might not react well and will probably say things that W doesn't want to hear. W arrived home to an empty house at noon and texts me "what are your plans today?. I ignore it and she repeats the text 20-minutes later. I reply that we are at MIL's but would be leaving soon to go hike at a state park. I also added "we can pick you up if you want to come". I expected her to decline saying she was tired or had to study, but she said "OK, sounds fun". I suspect she has some guilt over not spending time with the kids in a few days. So we all went to the park together and had a plesant day. One last note: When I look at W now, sometimes I see the person I married (the one I love) and sometimes I see someone I don't want to be with. It seems that the more I detach and GAL the less I want to be with her and the less I care about her and her WAW actions. Is this normal? If I do really good at detaching and GAL will I reach the point where I don't want her back? After all, she has broken my heart many times and I may reach the point where she no longer deserves me.
Me 46 W 43 M 17 S 14 D 11 ILYB 9/2010 EA began July/August 2010 ? PA began Nov/Dec 2010 ? I began DB in Jan 2011 I filed 7/12/11 Kids and I moved out 7/30/11 I'm in it for the kids and me.
