I will Survive.

[Shelby]

My STBXH was here the other night to visit with the Girls. They went out for a little bit and when they returned he came in. He gave me the tax return info I requested. He is still claiming that since he pays for 90% of the bills that he should get back 90% of the return and I only get 10%. I will have to check with my lawyer on Monday about this.

We sat down and talked for a little. The girl in his Vegas pictures is a co-worker. He said she is not his girlfriend but they are dating. What's the difference? He told me he is dating several women right now... He said since the day he had me served he can date whoever he wants. True ! I may not like it but it is true.

Again he told me he still loves me. This is the 3rd time in the last couple of months he has said this to me.

Why does he say this to me ? Is it to keep me in my place, does he think if I hear that I will continue to play nice like he wants. Or does he keep saying to keep me on the backburner. In case all this doesn't work out I will still be here waiting for him ? I don't know, I just find it odd he wants a divorce yet he still tells me he loves me.

I also asked him if he was happy now .... Nope. he still is not happy.
He said he has lots of regrets, but than he will not /can not go back.

I am so confused. I thought I was doing pretty good up until the past week. Now I have a sick feeling in my stomach all the time. My nerves are shot. I am seriously considering calling a therapist next week. Just to have someone to talk to will be nice