I agree with all of your advice, and previously I would have said the same and generally followed it. I just read too much into the changes my W made - in her decision to stay.
She's told people she is staying "for the kids", but the reality is she is staying "for the money".
There is a possibility (we are going to find out this weekend) that my W's dream property maybe in our reach, which has made my W very happy. She has been talking to me constantly about it. When she does I can see the W I used to know.
She even went so far to say that if we can make this happen she'll "gladly work on us"...I really don't believe it.
She told me last night that she doesn't know what I want, that everyone is "normal" now and that she said "Hi" and then just wnet about her business (because I hadn't seen her 2 days, and was looking to chat with her about the the kids and what had been going on). I told her what we have isn't normal. I want to be able to hold my W, to come home and be happy to see her, and her to be happy to see me, to ML and look forwward to spending time together.
I'm going to backoff again, but I really don't think it's going to help - I believe it just continues to make her more comfortable and lead her to believe that I am comfortable with the current sitch. That we can work together to make her dreams come true, and take care of kids as "roommates" and that is perfect for us.
I'm not ok with that...
Punchy, I have no idea ow you've made it throw limbo for sooooo long. Again, I imagine it also leads your W to believe that your fine with the arrangement. How is that ever going to change?
Me - 34 W - 33 M - 8 years T - 15 years D7, D5, D2 Bomb Nov 10/2010 "I'm not happy and INILWY" W Staying for the kids Mar 13/2011
