Smitty,
I am really sorry about your situation. I have had similar situations - where you think you have been working through past mistakes and it bottoms out. I'm glad you have been reading the books. Try to stay focused on the moment - especially now at the beginning.
IB


M-48/XH-48 M=25/T=28 years
Ds-24,22/S-18
D - 3/11
A Day at a Time