Be that person because you want to be. I know your W is angry, and he lashes out at you. I know your guts get tangled up inside and she appears to show little emotion, except when she tears up, when she gets angry, when she cries, when she lashes out, when her lips quiver, when her eyes tear up. Get the point?
Be the change.
We all have our dark, moments of agony even though one person's may be entirely different from another person's.
When we are in painful, terrible circumstances, we are in a position to turn it around and have something great come from it. Sure, we all wallow in self pity from time to time, but if we stop wallowing in self pity and make something happen from our most painful, darkest moments, great things will come of it.