The Roller Coaster Keeps on Rolling

[Redo]

Denver, dont want to hurt your feelings, but i feel TG is totally right. It was like Deja Vu reading this comments.

In 2009 wife left because she felt that i was never there for her, that she could not trust me because i supported my parents more than her blah blah blah...Yup, she felt i was the big bad wolf.

Then she came back after 6 months, partly because i changed some and i did woo her to come back. But guess what, she came back with the exact same feelings that she left with. Yup, I changed a lot during that time. Totally stopped my communications with my parents to appease her. I even stopped letting daughter talking to my parents to appease her. Yea things were lil better. But not a by a lot. Since she always felt that she was a victim, any little argument that we had, she just added it on top of her resentment feelings on me. Then she began to say that i had not changed a bit. Then she finally quit on me in 2011.

Why i say this? In 2009, i was just too happy to have her back. No conditions placed on her. But instead had i told not to come back until she exorcised all her resentments towards me at-least, we would not have come to this point.

Once this much damage has happened, i think both spouses need to own up to what they did. You are owning up your part. Your wife does not seem to be. If this happens, you will walk on eggshells. You will enable your wife to feel that she still is a victim and put down your spirits. It is just a vicious circle.

Sorry i am being too judgmental.