Well that was a really rubbish night shift at work and now I've got a banging headache and am trying to deicde what to do with myself for the next couple of hours. Think she's coming home later from work and wanted to "catch up" or something.

I think reality will be that she will go to the pub afterwards and not rock up home till much later.

I am feeling rubbish and have a banging head, but am desperate to see her. It's been about 6 days now since we've had a conversation of any kind. I'm beginning to think I've blown it by intentionally giving her space. She seems to have just drifted even further away and we have become even more like housemates.

At least the house I went to look at today was nice. There is hope for moving should I have to.

I really don't know what to do to sort this out. Just have to wait for counselling next week I guess. And take painkillers.

Reality is that which, if you don't believe in it, doesn't go away.