Do you know how many times I have asked myself the very same questions? And for the record, no disintegrating marriage has only one party at fault. There is always enought guilt to go around.
I believe the difference referred to here is not so much the Who and the What to be blamed, but how can I cope with this and turn it around to better myself for it. MLC aside, this Board has helped me get through some emotional tsunamis. It gives us a place to come and help each other through our troubles, to vent; something our WAS's probably don't have, with the exception of their damaged others.
Again, regardless of the reasons, there is much good advice to be had here, to help you through this, and perhaps to even turn things around in your marriage. There is no predicting that. We only control ourselves and our actions.
Kids make it that much rougher; but my kids are all adults and I see the pain it is/has caused them. Not to mention the grands.
I stopped asking myself those questions because the bottom line was this Board helped me, and others like me. Let's just accept it at that, and try to be the best us we can be. ( I should write for Hallmark!) (((HUGS))
