A newbie who is just now beginning to read Divorce Remedy. 4 weeks ago found out WS was having an affair. He won't accept it, but he is the poster child of MLC. Doesn't want to get D, but refuses to give her up. DS15 DD 19. I'm in IC. He is going as well, but has only gone once and didn't "agree" with what she said. He's in love. It's hard not to hate him at this point and kick him to the curb.
T: 28 years M: 23 years D19 S15 OW Discovery: 3/6/11
I'm new here too, but your sitch sounds similar to mine! I've done ALOT of reading on this site and you should really check out the "setting them free" link.
One thing that I have learned on here is that if you truly want your M to work YOU have to do it. Especially when they are "in love" with the OP. I know it's hard...believe me! My H has already left our home and is actively engaging in the A with the OW.
If I could give you any advice, it would be to be the best YOU that you can be. What were your contributions to the M breakdown? What do you think you could do to change so that they WANT to stay married to you?? These are hard questions, but in the end you have to be willing to do whatever you can to make it work.
Some of the vets on here will give you better advice and they'll be along shortly! Check out Country Song's posts...they have really given me alot of insight!
Me: 31 H: 30 Kids: D9 Together almost 12 years Married almost 5 years EA began: 8/10 Separated: 3/11
Hi, I am sorry you are going thru this, I know how painful it is. If you aren't speaking to a DB coach, I highly suggest you do. This is exactly what they are experts at. After your first session you will have a very specific plan on how to interact with your spouse differently (in person, on phone, text or email!)What you do now, can either push him further away or bring him closer. Even thru infidelity, couples find their way back to loving relationships. Please call me for further information and take good care.
Karen, Resource Coordinator The Divorce Busting Center 303-444-7004 karen@divorcebusting.com
Give me a call if you'd like to schedule an appointment to speak with a Divorce Busting® Coach.