Sitting at home with myself, part 2

[Denver_2010]

Maybe a good way to look at it is that she's back enough emotionally to be a friend and that allows her to work on getting to the point where she can emotionally be a W.

A few thoughts...

1. In most of these situations you have to build the friendship back first. Jumping back into a R without that foundation is a recipe for disaster. I will rebuilding your M is not your job or her job alone. You have to work together

2. Of course, she's telling you she's back for the kids. Heck, she's probably telling herself that as well. But I do think there is more feelings that she isn't ready to talk about yet.
She probably isn't ready to work you your M RIGHT NOW, but don't take it to mean that she will never want to work on your M.

My W said kinda the same thing, she wouldn't get a D for our kids sake. I told her straight up that I wouldn't be in a marriage like that for the rest of my life.
I think the real message was I'm working through this at my own pace and I don't want you to interfere with that with that in any way. My W eventually came around to have feelings for me and tells me ILY almost every day.

I think that what Harrier is saying is dead on correct. Continue being patient. And like Harrier said in an earlier post, your W is watching you to see if the changes are real and permanent. It is a test, kind of. You are doing great by what I can tell. Keep staying focused... being the NEW Navy.

BITS
Denver