confused bolt

[Bolt]

now I have a very stupid question here. How long do I continue to do this work with the M or R in question?

She's trying to get a dissolution as fast as possible. I still don't want this to end but I literally have no say in it. It's going to happen no matter what. I do it now, I have some dignity..well, maybe not but I can have a bit more money. The longer it goes, the more impossible it becomes.

Or do I simply split things, separate and wait for her to file in 6 months?

I'm truly at a dilemma. I'm still processing. There are times I don't want her. I can't stand her but then I think of what I could have done and what I wanted to do and just HOW CLOSE it seemed we were to really making this work.

Maybe I'm still not at the step to make a decision...I don't know.