It was the most painful situation I had to endure during those 6 months. At first, I did everything wrong....spying, texting, calling, crying, begging etc. This got me know where. I read about the No Contact rule and I began to see small changes. He began sending me funny messages, at first I ignored them all but eventually began replying.
We did have contact with each other, he came to our home on the weekends and a few days during the week. My biggest mistake, was letting him cake eat. he had the best of both worlds. I willl never make that mistake again.
Just out of the blue, he decided to come home. I am confused...while he was living with her my H was loving me, hugging me, kissing me, spending time with our 14 yr old son, we ate together, went shopping together ect. The hardest thing was saying goodnight knowing he was leaving our home to go sleep with another. It was horrible and painful wrapped into one.
Now since he's been back home....I get nothing. He is cold, distant, appears angry, we don't kiss, touch, he sleeps on the edge of the bed. When I ask questions, he becomes defensive and just says to me, "Why are you asking so many questions???" He told me his feeling don't feel the same. Now this really threw me for a loop. I don't know what to do now.
I feel the 23 yr old is still pursuing him....he gets mysterious text messages at certain times and its mainly when she gets off from the prison at 7pm. I can't prove this, but I suspect.
When I found out about his affair, he asked if i had ever cheated on him and I wanted to be honest with him and told him yes.....4 yrs ago I made a mistake of being intimate with a friend of mine of 20 years. We had always had a thing for each other growing up but never acted upon those feelings. He is married as well. This was another huge mistake....never come clean even its the right thing to do. Now my husband brings it up all the time, even though he was actually living with another woman. I know 2 wrongs doesn't make a right, but my A was 4 years ago and nothing came out of it. My friend and I both realized that our friendship was much more important than a roll in the sack.
At times, I feel my husband is now punishing me for my mistake. I asked the Lord to forgive me and I know he has, but my husband won't. It seems he wants me to over look his mistake but can't mine. Yes, he is home physically, but not emotionally. I miss my husband's touch, love and affection and most of all his friendship.
If anyone has any advice, please share with me. I want nothing more than to restore my marriage. He has not mention anything about divorce.
