confused bolt

[Bolt]

Well, I'm not too much confused these days

I went over to the W's house to pick up all of my stuff and went in with a very positive attitude. I told myself, I can either be miserable and intolerant or fun and respectful. At first, it worked. I was very jovial with the kids, the W and the MIL (who is no LONGER an ally - I should have seen that coming a mile away). I even joked a little with the W.

But then I made the "mistake" of walking up the stairs from the basement to the garage to look for something. The W was in the garage and said, "Please don't walk through MY house without permission."

It took everything from going crazy. See, I was duped into signing a lease on this house so technically, it was every much as my house as it was hers. I couldn't believe she was saying it and she even muttered something about signing papers. I left but then let my emotions get a hold of me. I told her that until she gets me off the lease, I have every right to be there. She then threatened to call the cops. I told her to go ahead! I need some help moving!

I left and continued to move my stuff.

Things calmed down later and were left on better terms.
But I did see that this person that I loved doesn't exist anymore and may never come back. This person I'm interacting with isn't my W and therefore will not be treated as such. She is looking for any and every angle to dig at me and I refuse to let her anymore.

I guess I took a step forward today in acceptance...I know I will fall back but at least I am seeing the light and beginning to see that things will be much better sooner...

I'm sticking around these boards for a while for ME now...not for us or for our M...for ME.