New and saying hello

[~¤DG¤~]

Journaling---------

I should go see my C every day, because then maybe I would feel in control of my life.
I was more emotional today than I have been in weeks.
I admitted that as hard as I am trying to do things for me, I often feel like I am doing them for him.

And I'm waiting. And waiting.

And then my mind starts to wander, and then I start thinking irrational thoughts,
And they become real, and then I am upset and worked up over absolutely nothing. Just something that popped into my head.

I have to stop listening to the negative talk within myself.
I know that makes me sound like I hear voices in my head, but I don't.

She told me every time I start to feel negative, then I should start listing all the things I am grateful for.
At this rate, I'm going to be talking to myself all day long.

I know I've grown. I know I still have a long ways to go but I have also come a long way.
I didn't realize it until she started reading some notes she took from my first visit months ago.

I will be ok. Hopefully.