Peace, Yes, God has become my new BFF! This awful experience is definitely bringing me closer to Him.
Punkin, I am calmer now, but for how long? My feelings cycle out of the blue. Had a very difficult weekend, I was depressed and the kids were acting out/hurting and that only makes it harder to deal. Yesterday D4 started acting up when H was getting ready to leave, and right after he left D2 peed all over the kitchen floor. I am angry that he gets to be gone and not witness the fallout of his actions. I did manage to be friendly to him yesterday though, so that was good. He told me a story about a weird guy who sends him gifts at work. He is still wearing his ring, so I put mine back on so as to not send him the wrong message.
Over the weekend I spent several hours with my SIL (H's sister) and she filled in a lot of blanks for me. She said she and H were neglected as kids, never told ILY, never told I'm proud of you, never talked to about feelings, emotions, how to cope with stuff, in fact they were inadvertently taught not to show emotion and to stuff it. Explains so much about why H is so messed up now. I never knew any of this! I thought he came from the all-American family! It's shocking and so so sad.
Me- 35 H- 36 M- 7 T- 9 D3, D5 Bomb 1/21/11 EA/PA began 12/10? Discovered A 3/2/11 S- 3/3/11 OW gone- 4/27/11 H says he wants to reconcile, but lacking action
