We want that validation, we really really want it to make sure that f-er is 6 feet deep, and maybe jump up and down on the grave too.
Bringing him up, reminders her of the hurt she caused, reminds her of him. Instead of having a nice day together she enjoys.
Plus it can be seen as a victory lap.
Hmmm... I didn't see anything wrong with me saying that until I just read this post. You are absolutely right Jack. And you are also right about it being about my own need for validation. Thanks for that.
Originally Posted By: Jack_Three_Beans
We don't care that he gets hurt, in fact lets be honest, we sort of enjoy it. Serves him right. Can I get an Amen?
AMEN!!
BITS Denver
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce
I am going to misquote the hell out of it but there is something in the book about "I am not an expert on what works, but I know what doesn't work"
That's really what it comes down to. In then end, some M will be saved, some won't. We don't have a magic bullet for what works, we are simply not trying to dig our own graves by doing what doesn't work.
Denver, what your doing is working. I agree that very cautious optimism is warranted. But that is what I see. Just remember what you learned and you'll be fine.
BITS
Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
Denver, Your progress is nothing short of amazing. MWD should let you conduct a seminar on this thing. I am truly happy for you. You and I started this thing together and at least one of us is going to finish.
Please be careful. Please continue to focus. This really is the much harder part of your journey. She is going to take a chance on you. She is going to gamble her heart on Denver one more time. Don't make her regret her choice, OK? Be that new guy you have shown us each and every day. Be the champ that you are for her and for us.
BITS never walk alone!
FOBD
Me: 39 W: 36 T: 15 yrs M: 9 yrs S: 09/10
So you can get on with your search, baby And I can get on with mine And maybe someday we will find, That it wasn't really wasted time...
Thanks everyone for sticking with me. I know that I need to update. I think that I have writer's block! LOL...
Update coming soon.
BITS Denver
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce
Glad to see you around Denver. I'm looking forward to your update and happy to see you having success.
Me:45 ExW:48 M:04/97 3 Bombs & 2 ReCons 1st BD 11/10 D Finalized 4/20 D-16 S-14 Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa