Keeping the Faith

[Sanderika]

(((Hugs))) Ladies,

Scylla, GAG, CW, Beatrice, Cas & Seeking...THANK YOU ALL

In reality I am hoping that H will want to attempt further Couples Counseling with me for the reasons mentioned.

I want to call him to the carpet further on the use of the word BETRAYED. Correct me if I am all out of whack and warped on this BUT....BETRAYED....OMG, what about H?

BETRAYED is a word I would have used to describe him when he left son and I, when we both needed him the most for support. (Me for depression and son for a new diagnosis of Asperger's)

BETRAYED is a word I would have used to describe H when he took up with OW breaking our covenant marriage.

BETRAYED is a word I would have used to described H when he and his OW ousted me from my own company three years ago because OW wanted my job.

BETRAYED is a word I would have used to describe H's abandonment and neglect he forced upon my son countless times in favor of his own selfishness and egotistical fulfillment as he pursued the OW.

HE DOESN'T HAVE A CLUE IN LIFE.....

I want to further meet him again in therapy to discuss his actual role in the demise of the marriage. H was commonly staying out all night which contributed painfully towards my depression (I felt unloved and unappreciated). After his cancer and remission H played the role of "It's my life...I'm gonna do exactly what I want". I went through hell for years after. I nursed him during that two years with cancer. I never betrayed him.

This was also a factor which contributed to his MLC down the road.

Dr. R did use the words MLC towards H once. When he mentioned that H could Live Alone, he said that H could go off into the sunset and have his MLC.

I am dumbfounded at the pure appearance of selfish and childish behaviors. I could never imagine being a person who would want to be like that.

The two hours we met certainly was not enough time to delve into all of the troubles. I am thinking now that the troubles are more H's than mine.

I have decided that should H choose not to engage therapy further H will be ordered to put an offer in writing and my role as his wife/friend will cease. I cannot accept the harsh words and demeanor H has used against me. It only proves his pathetic state. It will be very unhealthy for me and son to be in his presence.

My son noted to me yesterday that he went into H's fridge for water yesterday and H's fridge was absolutely empty. Son said: "Mom there wasn't anything in there". Just thought it interesting.

Thanks and hugs ladies, I will keep you all posted.

Sanderika