MLC Purgatory

[peacetoday]

Meganna

MLC is a real thing-It is a crises caused by some unresolved childhood issues-It has nothing to do with the spouse
yes, we all did things in our M..and we can evaluate our mistakes , so to learn from them.

At first it is hard to understand why our H seem so different
Many lie, many mclcers spend when once they were so careful with money
Many become different parents after they seem so devoted, many cheat when once they were so loyal
Some of the books are helpful by Jim Conway
We may never understand the whys of it
I belive your H is confused as many a MLC
yes he still loves you, he is unhappy in himself
The MLC is usually afraid of D I think because they are unsure and D is so final
Many a MLCer would like to keep the LBS hanging, waiting just in case his plans fold
It is excellent that he is in IC..That is the only place he can figure it out

Some things that helped me early in this:
AS hard as it is--
For H
be friendly and cordial toward him
thank him for simple things
validate him
No nagging, no complaining, no fighting about what he feels or says, no snooping
let him go--

For YOu:
Watch your finances.
seperate accounts and credit cards
get your name off his credit cards
do it discreetly and lovingly not to point blame or start a fight..just take care of yourself because many a MLCEr will go in debt--this is true and I experienced it first hand but I did not lose anything financially
XH lost everything including a thriving business
Continue IC
Get sleep, find supportive women many women of all ages can relate to this and can be supportive
Exercise
eat healthier
rest..learn to meditate or relax
pray and journel
spend a little fun time with a girl friend
Kids:
Spend some quality time as you do with them
love them..listen to them
tell them it is not their fault
everyone loves them and you are here for them
everyday will get better
the pain will stop
you will be internally guided with the help of the therapist
trust the process
we have all done it
Peace