help! so unsure what to do.........

[peacetoday]

Grr

My first reaction to your post was it didnt seem like a good idea to move back together for your son
I know it is difficult on the kids, my Daughter was 11 son 5 when bomb hit
My D took it much harder
it was a difficult time
Living with my xh at the time was a nightmare for me
he stayed out all hours of the night
didnt speak to me
left the room when I entered it
finally when he moved out, the house became peaceful and my healing probably began
In my opinion, living with a MLCer is very difficult
Many on the board have done it
Every situation is different, and It is a great idea to seek help for everyone involved
Take your time to make the decision

I think a few things helped my kids the most:

I started to sit with each of them at night and talk and mostly LISTEN
I always told them it wasnt their fault, there was nothing they could do to prevent this
I always said kind words about their dad to this day
I explained that Dad is not sure what he wants now in his life, and sometimes grown ups have to take some time to heal and grow inside and figure things out
Dad was not a bad person, but he had soul searching to do and we had to let him go.

My xh left the state and has no contact with us, so we literally had to let him go
My kids seem ok to me
they both talk to me and do well in school

You will figure it out
It takes time
your s will adjust
I think as hard as it is, if the kids seem to think we are ok,and we will get thru it, they will be ok
peace